The Comparisons

When did your baby start laughing?  How about crawling?  Can't he walk yet?  How much is he eating?  Does he sleep through the night?  Why doesn't he have teeth yet?

The minute your baby enters the world, you've also unknowingly delivered a big, fat wad of The Comparisons.  From here on out, be prepared to know every stat and fact about your baby so that you can sit around and incessantly compare yourself to other mothers, or let them do it for you.  Even if you don't want to join in the game, don't worry- they'll come to you.  They won't let you sit alone at the lunch table.  They'll come and they'll ask questions and they'll give you Looks.

Did your baby get teeth after theirs did?  Don't worry, they'll let you know.  Did their baby walk sooner?  They'll draw you a picture.  Did their baby sleep through the night at 2 weeks old and hasn't made a peep since?  They'll slyly throw that in when you mention yet another sleepless night.

It's all there for you.  The Comparisons.  The ability to drive yourself absolutely insane wondering if your baby is "normal".  You'll ask your doctor if he should be crawling yet, or talking yet, or playing the piano yet.  And the doctors will tell you what they've always told you "every baby is different".  But it won't matter because those little facts from the other mothers?  They'll stick in your head so hard that you'll need the jaws of life to cut them out.

And if you're thinking it's just about the babies, it's not.  Prepare to compare YOURSELF to the actual mothers.  Did she lose weight faster than you?  Did she breastfeed longer?  How does she always look so put together?  But I can guarantee you that these same mothers sometimes cry in the shower wondering if they can make it through another day of tempter tantrums.  And these same mothers worry that they're not sure if that rash is something to be concerned about.  And these same mothers look at other mothers and wonder how their lives are so put together.

We all do it.  We compare ourselves.  We can't help it, it's human nature.  We want our lives to be perfect, even when there is no such thing.  So how about we all just shake on it, call it a truce, and promise to stop comparing and belittling and giving the Looks.  Because each of us out here is just doing our best in the cutthroat game of Motherhood.  And our babies?  They're as perfect as can be, because they're OURS.