I'm Here, But I'm Not

photo-1429679310900-bad303d0e63a I've been blogging since the summer of 2011.  Nearly four years of my life has been devoted to telling stories, sharing photos, and wondering what I'm actually doing in this space.  I started as a fashion blogger and have landed somewhere that can only be described as a lifestyle blogger.  I've alienated some readers, and welcomed others.  I've grown this space to numbers that I had never dreamed of when I first started putting words on a screen.  I've been given opportunities that I didn't know existed and have transformed them into something more than a hobby, but less than a career.

If you've been along since the beginning, you would've seen an engagement, a wedding, a honeymoon, a pregnancy and a life with a newborn.  You would've seen me change monumentally.  I am not the same person I was back when I took photos of my outfits and put them out for the world to see and judge.  The person I am now isn't someone I ever thought I'd be.  I never knew how much I would love being a mother.  I never knew how drastically my mindset would change.

For the past (almost) four years, I have blogged religiously five days a week.  Occasionally I'd miss a day, but in all, I've written over 1000 posts.  1000 times I wrote down a portion of my life and hit publish for you to read, or skim, or skip.  And each time I hit that publish button, I felt a tiny pang of fear that maybe I wasn't good enough, and that I had no idea why my readers were continuing to hang in there with me.  My journey through life isn't groundbreaking.  I'm not dealing with anything extraordinary.  I'm simply a wife and mother who works full time and loves to write.

All of this rambling is to say that I know I haven't been around as frequently as I used to.  I've been busy working on my next great adventure- Holl & Lane.  It is without a doubt the most exciting, exhausting, exhilarating and many other e-type words that I can't think of right now.  I'm bringing to life YOUR words this time.  I'm telling YOUR stories.  And is it a great responsibility to make sure that they are told correctly.  I want to make you proud that your stories are being told in the magazine pages.  And I want to make myself proud that I've gone after this huge dream of mine.

So that's where I've been.  I've been working my ass off.  Each night I'm designing the pages that will showcase your stories.  But I felt I owed it to you to let you know that I might be around in this space, and I might not be.  But don't forget about me.  Because I'm still here.  Thank you for being the reason I feel capable of going after this dream.  Thank you for supporting me, and for continuing to read even when I don't have anything groundbreaking to share.  And I'm excited to show you what I've been working on.

I'm going to be releasing the magazine to the people on my email list a week early, on Tuesday, May 26th.  So in just 20 days all of this hard work will be out there, and I hope you'll be proud of me.