On Hometowns

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12670711_10207196059274381_2135096432211481751_n What do you consider your hometown?  Is it the place where you lay your head each night?  Is it where your Mom still makes you your favorite dinner when you visit?  I've always wondered, do you find your hometown when you start calling a city "home"?

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I haven't found that yet.

Or at least, I don't think I have.  We bought a house here in Pennsylvania.  We set down roots and we're raising our son here.  And when we're away, I often think "I can't wait to get home".  But then when we talk about going to visit our families, we talk about "going home".  So is that our home?  Is our home, our home?  To me, my home is wherever Brandon and Henry are, that's my true home.  But a physical place in the world- where is my home?

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Brandon and I talk a lot about where our lives will take us someday.  At one point we thought we'd travel to new and different cities constantly.  We'd live in Boston and Portland and San Diego and who knows where else.  But we'd never, NEVER, return "home".  Home, to Toledo, Ohio.  Because what is in Toledo for us?  It isn't the up and coming city of our dreams.  It isn't the city that people flock to when they want to experience cultural diversity.  It isn't even the city with solid job opportunities.

But it is the place where our parents live (or at least in the surrounding areas).  It is the place where we met.  It is the place where our very best friends live.  It is the place where we gather to let Henry play with his cousins.  It is the place where we could be a couple again because we'd have people who were gladly willing to take Henry for us any night we asked.  It is the place where we'd have our village to help us raise Henry.  So is that what makes it a home?

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I don't know what the future holds for my family of three.  I don't know if we'll be in Pennsylvania for years and years and years to come.  I don't know if we'll still take that risk and move across the country someday.  And I don't know if we'll someday end up back "home" in Toledo.  But I do know that for the first time in my entire adult life, I'm finally opening up to the idea of being back there.  Of raising my family with all of those people who love us so much.  Of going home.